I have the best intentions to try to get better. I go to bed at night and promise to try harder tomorrow.
But tomorrow never seems to come.
I see the numbers. I can understand logically where everyone is coming from. I know they are right. I laugh at their accusations because in reality I know they are true.
But you can't force yourself to do something you don't want to do. I feel like I earned this. I take their criticisms as compliments. It means I'm doing something right (even though I know it's wrong).
I'd like to say that I'll do better, try harder (or at all). But I don't think I'm there yet.
Edit:
I just realized I wrote basically this same thing back in March. Wow. So much for progress I guess.
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